“Jeremiah Watkins also headlining on the road now the little baby gorilla is all grown up he's headlining Huntington Beach”

“not reg boss nope not rich Hoss but tonight is no exception to our amazing comedian rule”

“she opens for Pete Holmes and Eliza Schlessinger I'd imagine you bury Eliza pretty deeply no no”

“if David Deary is listening I need a sharpie marker I'm sure he's listening right how about a hand for Brandon the intern heap picks up all the slack when David Gary's out running around”

“The great Ryan J E belt is here everyone look at that drawing tonight's episode the author of kill Tony the book”

“I am going to New York on a secret mission this weekend watching Nate Diaz fight and doing some other fun things”

“this last night in Sydney they were feminists Stacy and feminists Maisie crowd went wild the some of their more famous characters ever”