In this powerful and deeply personal episode, we sit down with David Archuleta to discuss his new memoir, Devout: Losing My Faith to Find Myself. David opens up about his life inside of Mormonism, his rise to fame on American Idol, his mission, his relationship with Church leaders, and the long, painful journey toward self-acceptance as a gay man. This conversation goes far beyond headlines. David walks us through the internalized shame, religious scrupulosity, and obsessive righteousness that shaped his childhood and young adulthood. He reflects on the messages he received about masculinity, sexuality, and obedience –and how those teachings distorted his understanding of intimacy, trust, and self-worth. We explore David’s experiences with Mormon apostles, including M. Russell Ballard, the November 2015 Policy, and the unsettling realization that Church leaders often spoke with certainty despite privately admitting they had no answers. David shares what it was like to be counseled to marry a woman, to suppress his identity, and to believe his faith could “heal” him –while quietly spiraling toward despair. This episode also addresses growing up in a Mormon bubble, religious OCD, messages about LGBTQ people, chastity and sin, fame and unpaid church services, leaving the church and reclaiming agency and what happiness and God look like for him now. David speaks with extraordinary honesty, vulnerability, and compassion –not just for himself, but for the countless LGBTQ people still navigating high-demand religions. Order his book here: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Devout/David-Archuleta/9781668222485 Show notes: https://www.mormonstories.org/david-archuletas-mormon-story-devout/ Timecodes: 00:00:00 Introduction to David Archuleta and His New Memoir 00:06:04 Reflections on His Nontraditional Mormon Upbringing 00:14:14 Teachings on the Law of Chastity and LGBTQ Identity 00:17:10 The Influence of The Miracle of Forgiveness by Spencer W. Kimball 00:21:44 Concealing His Queer Identity from His Mother 00:25:22 Discovering His Father’s Treatment of His Sisters 00:26:39 Experiencing Same-Sex Attraction in Childhood 00:29:11 Messaging Within the LDS Young Men’s Program 00:31:20 Scrupulosity and Religious OCD 00:35:18 Cultural Suspicion of Therapy 00:39:01 Same-Sex Attraction During His Mission 00:42:04 Confessing to His Mission President 00:47:02 His Relationship with Elder Ballard and Other Church Leaders 00:52:31 Fear and Internalized Shame 00:56:22 Prioritizing Church Service Over Career 00:59:37 The Impact of the November 2015 Policy 01:04:56 Dan Reynolds and “Believer” 01:10:44 Conversations with Charlie Bird About Coming Out 01:12:49 Struggles with Suicidal Ideation 01:15:56 Questions Posed by Elder Ballard 01:21:30 Observations on Same-Sex Married Latter-day Saints and Well-Being 01:24:08 Elder Ballard’s Comments on the November 2015 Policy 01:29:18 Reading from the Memoir: A Surprising Admission 01:31:35 Feeling Ghosted by Elder Ballard 01:37:13 Remaining in the Church Without Excommunication or Resignation 01:42:43 Deconstructing Joseph Smith and Church History 01:44:00 The Concept of God He Was Taught Growing Up 01:49:27 Finding Happiness After Leaving the Church 01:53:00 Closing Remarks and Where to Find the Book ___________________ At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals. Our overall mission is to: 1. Facilitate informed consent amongst LDS Church members, investigators, and non-members regarding Mormon history, doctrine, and theology 2. Support Mormons (and members of other high-demand religions) who are experiencing a religious faith crisis 3. Promote healing, growth and community for those who choose to leave the LDS Church or other high demand religions 🤝Help us continue to deliver quality content by becoming a donor today One-time or recurring donations: https://donorbox.org/mormon-stories?default_interval=m Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/mormonstories Paypal: https://paypal.me/mormonstories Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx6OgmoqJbOVRq-Lv1P7SzA/join Our Platforms: 🌐Mormon Stories Blog: https://www.mormonstories.org/episodes 🎙️Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories ✳️Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4sDzk7dRjODTSEqzZKZJzk?si=148b0efc1ccc4404&nd=1 🍎Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mormon-stories-lds/id312094772 🖼️Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mormstories 📱TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mormonstoriespodcast 🎮Discord: https://discord.com/invite/kuX5p6yyjF Contact us: 📧 MormonStories@gmail.com 📬PO Box 171085, Salt Lake City, UT 84117