Vanessa Marin (Pillow Talks, Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life) is a sex therapist and podcaster. Vanessa joins the Armchair Expert to discuss her experience getting the "the talk" from her parents, why there is often so much shame around sexuality, and how much stress kills libido. Vanessa and Dax discuss how vulnerability and neediness differ, how sex is often more focused on male pleasure, and responsive vs spontaneous desire. Vanessa talks about the psychology involved when initiating sex, the importance of understanding that emotional and physical intimacy go hand-in-hand, and when to best talk to your partner about sex. Watch Armchair Expert episodes: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLzPEuwClyOzDdlrAmU-IwKncG87qrF7Vw Follow Armchair Expert on social: https://www.instagram.com/armchairexppod https://www.facebook.com/ArmchairExpPod/ https://twitter.com/armchairexppod Connect with Wondery https://wondery.com/shows/armchair-expert-with-dax-shepard/ https://www.facebook.com/WonderyMedia https://twitter.com/WonderyMedia https://www.instagram.com/WonderyMedia https://www.tiktok.com/@wonderymedia About the Show: Hi, I’m Dax Shepard, and I love talking to people. I am endlessly fascinated by the messiness of being human, and I find people who are vulnerable and honest about their struggles and shortcomings to be incredibly sexy. I invite you to join me as I explore other people’s stories. We will celebrate, above all, the challenges and setbacks that ultimately lead to growth and betterment. What qualifies me for such an endeavor? More than a decade of sobriety, a degree in Anthropology and four years of improv training. I will attempt to discover human “truths” without any laboratory work, clinical trials or data collection. I will be, in the great tradition of 16th-century scientists, an Armchair Expert. Watch Armchair Expert every MONDAY, WEDNESDAY, and FRIDAY here on Youtube! Listen to episodes ad-free by joining Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Start your free trial by visiting https://wondery.com/shows/armchair-expert-with-dax-shepard/ #armchairexpert #daxshepard Episode 809